Obama Issues Letters of Marque and Reprisal

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Congress expressed outrage after President Obama issued letters of marque and reprisal to several golfing friends who own yachts. Article One of the Constitution lists the issuing of such letters as one of the enumerated powers of Congress. But White House Spokesman Allen Kutler stated, "The President thought it was a really cool power so he just took it. He has authority through either an executive order or being Commander-in-Chief. He called me on a bad line and told me, but there was a party going on in the background so I'm not a hundred percent certain." Technically, the president's friends could use their yachts to attack and seize other vessels then have the ships sold in Admiralty Court and pocket the profit. Kutler laughed off such scenario. "Does Libya even have boats? Beats me. But you have to admit, it is a cool power. I'm not sure about the reprisal part. But the President has that power too so it's Okay." (Image: Wickipedia)