Biden Tasered During Spanish Army Speech

MADRID, SPAIN - During a speech to Spanish troops delivered in English, Vice President Joe Biden was tasered by his own security detail. "This may cost me my job," said Glenn Howard, Secret Service agent. "But why would you address a foreign army in a language they don't understand? Biden does stuff like this every day. I can't stand it anymore." Once the darts were removed, Biden recovered quickly, seemed energized and alert, and finished his speech in flawless Spanish. "Howard is history," said an anonymous source in the Secret Service, "but he's given us a good idea."