Charlie Sheen Stricken with 'Power Rangers' Villain Voice

HOLLYWOOD, CA - Troubled actor Charlie Sheen has been diagnosed with a rare disease that causes him to speak like a villain in an episode of Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. If you listen to his tirade on the Alex Jones radio program he comes across like a kung fu bad guy," said Dr. Waylon Corning of Cedar Sinai Medical Center. Dr. Corning quoted Sheen's remarks re. Two and a Half Men show runner Chuck Lorre: 'Clearly, I have defeated this earthworm with my words—imagine what I would have done with my fire breathing fists.' "That's Malum Lingua Power Ranger," said Dr. Corning. "We don't see it often, but we know it when it pops up." Animation industry experts were quick to back up Dr. Corning's diagnosis. Said cartoon writer Chuck Lagarre, "Wishing [Chuck Lorre] 'nothing but pain in your silly travels especially if they wind up in my octagon' is pure gold. I wish I'd written something that goofy and over-the-top." Dr. Corning stated there is little medical science can do to check Malum Lingua Power Ranger. "The best hope is to draw it all out. First digitally record his rants, then try and animate a character to them. Then build a show around that character. It could even be a big hit like Megamind, I bet." (Image: michellezive.com)