Tuesday, March 23, 2010
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Having just signed into law a massive new healthcare bill, President Obama was stunned to learn he is exempt from its provisions. "You've gotta be kidding me," cried the President in shock and outrage. "Let me be perfectly clear, this is a terrible outrage." Thousands of congressional staffers are also exempt, despite having worked on and written the bill. "It's so unfair," stated Kari Beedle, a house staffer. "I wish I knew how this happened. We sweated to pass wondrous, caring legislation and now we're stuck with some lousy old health care that gives us choices." The President was firm. "Congress must act to close the loophole denying myself and thousands of others in government this symbol of change. But they must not be hasty. I say to congress, 'Take your time, do it right.' I'll wait. Let me know in a couple of years. My family and I will get by somehow."