Newsweek Merges with Highlights For Children

COLUMBUS, OH - As part of a market expansion, The Washington Post Company has purchased Highlights for Children. Said Post Company spokesperson Lillian St. Francis, "We're blending the style and layout of Highlights with the impartial journalistic insight of Newsweek." St. Francis said the new publication, Newsweek Highlights, would feature fun, fact-filled pages designed to keep the old readership while reaching out to attract busy children. Editor-in-Chief Evan Thomas is reportedly working on the new layout. "We're delighted with Evan's measured approach," said St. Francis. For instance, Goofus and Gallant will teach social skills by showing George W. Bush and Barack Obama performing the same action two different ways. Headwork features simple questions for kids written by Eleanor Clift, including such teasers as: 'Is Sarah Palin evil or stupid and evil?' And, of course, the back page of every issue will showcase What's Wrong? with readers searching a picture of children at play for objects that don't fit such as free enterprise, low taxes, or signs critical of President Obama. (Photos: onceuponawin.com & samuelatgilgal...)