Past Beheadings No Excuse for Holding Gitmo Suspect

WASHINGTON, D. C. - A Judge has ruled the U.S. may not hold a Guantanamo Bay, Cuba detainee over fears he will return to beheading people for Al-Qaeda. "He must be released," said U.S. District Court Judge Aaron Goodstool, "and his big sword returned to him." After lopping off the heads of four Western aid workers in Afghanistan, Hasid Salmeh was captured in 2002. Judge Goodstool has ruled the government's evidence is insufficient and that Salmeh must be released if religious worship is to mean anything. "We have no right to judge," remarked Goodstool. "Because a man pursues his faith aggressively is no reason to deny him the company of fellow worshipers. Let's not make a mockery of the law."