Thursday, April 30, 2009

Liberals Replace Handshake with Teabagging

HOLLYWOOD, CA - Media and Hollywood liberals have replaced the handshake with the more time-consuming gesture of teabagging. According to participants, this practice began last November as a way of showing post-Prop 8 solidarity with Gays. Previously unknown to the public, teabagging leaked out during media discussion of tax day demonstrations. Said NPR producer Jenn Langemark, "That's why people like Anderson Cooper and Rachel Maddow were so tickled. They'd been teabagging for months, and suddenly these right-wingers start talking tea parties. It was way too funny." Not everyone is pleased with the new practice. Said one anonymous ABC writer: "After awhile, you stop wanting to meet people. Or go to parties, since saying 'hello' and 'good-bye' can take up to ninety minutes. I sure wish we'd found a different colored ribbon instead."
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Steve Burri said...

Let me boil some water for your teabag, Mr. Cooper.

Ling Carter said...

You must admit, it does give conservatives and libertarians a decided edge in running for office.

We're not afraid to stand outside a factory and greet the workers.

Dutch said...

Does this replace the courtesy reach around when talking to a lobbyist? A friend told me about it, I have no personal knowledge of the practice. Really. I likes the ladies. There goes one now, look at them gams, only a heterosexual would say that... Sure I had thoughts about Obama, but only in the news room... And once while I was with my wife, she got a little pissed when I called her Barrack in a moment of passion.

What about the complementary fisting for every Republican Senator that changes his allegiance? I'll really miss that.

Anonymous said...

A person could save time by only associating with people like Lance Armstrong and Tom Green