Top Taliban Commader Trapped Beneath Large Box

WASHINGTON, D.C. - U.S. and Pakistani intelligence forces captured the Taliban's top military commander using a very large box propped up with a stick. According to anonymous sources, Mullah Adbul Ghani Baradar was drawn to the trap by reports that there was a woman inside reading Family Circle. The enraged commander entered carrying a whip, only to inadvertently kick the support stick, dropping the box around him. "There wasn't really a woman in there," said the source. "Just an inflatable woman dressed in a burqa that we borrowed from a very lonely man in the State Department."