California Slashes Department of Puppetry

SACRAMENTO, CA - As part of a deal to close the state's 26.3 billion dollar deficit, Governor Schwarzenegger and legislative leaders agreed to deep cuts in the state's Department of Puppetry. "Naturally, this will hurt children, the poor and members of the Puppetry Local," said Assembly Speaker democrat Karen Bass. Responsible for quality puppet shows at libraries, freeway on-ramps, and prisons, the department has issued orders downsizing marionettes and eliminating entirely the popular sock puppet division. "Losing sock puppets is like losing an old friend," said puppetry worker Adolph Tyne. "Not necessarily a friend who was old in years, but one whom you liked and saw on a regular, non-sexual basis. Maybe even a friend with button eyes, if there is such a thing. I'm so sad I want to sob like an old weepy crone." (Photo: www.buycostumes.com)