WASHINGTON, D.C. - Green Jobs Czar Van Jones has edged perennial favorite Lyndon LaRouche in the 2009 Nut Trifecta. Sponsored by Nuts for Change, the yearly event crowns as winner the person holding three or more really crazy views for one year. Jones broke from the pack this week with the revelations that he was:
1. a communist
2. 9/11 Truther
3. a fee Mumia guy.
"Jones is surging," said Nut spokesperson Caliph Sydney. "But I think he'll fade. Lyndon is so grounded in nutism. He believes Newton's theory of gravity is a fraud and that Islam was invented by the Portuguese government. That's the low hanging fruit. And there's lots more where that came from." (Photo: newlivingexpo.com)