Monday, December 8, 2008

Newly Discovered Dinosaurs Were Cowards

BAMAKO, MALI - Swedish scientists digging near the Niger River have uncovered a new species of Jurassic dinosaur that appeared to have been terrible-looking but weak. "They were enormous animals with great fangs, spiked tails, huge claws, and sharp horns," said paleontologist Gert Lomborg. "But fossil evidence indicates they preferred feeding on very small prey, which they attacked from ambush in overwhelming numbers." Preliminary findings also indicate that during mating season, the creatures stood around quietly, hoping to be picked. Lomborg noted that bone damage showed many of the animals died in stampedes, probably induced by panic attacks. For now, the species remains unnamed. Lomborg said, "My assistant enjoys American rap music. So we're calling the animal 'Punk-ass-girlyboy-saurus' until we think of something shorter."

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