Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Last Minute Gift Ideas

(INI thanks Dutch at PODM for these thoughtful holiday suggestions.)

Motor Oil: Everyone has a car and the lines are short at auto supply stores this time of year. A colorfully wrapped case of 10w 40 has a pleasing heft and you can’t beat the look on mom's face when she unwraps it.

Live Bait: Let's face it, everyone loves to fish on Christmas Day: just ask Scott Peterson. Again, short lines are appealing and it’s convenient for friends that live near a pier. Make sure it’s thoroughly iced. Water proof wrapping is recommended for this sure fire holiday pleaser. 

Fire Arms: Hand guns preferred, but long arms will do. Don’t bother wrapping, just put it in a brown paper bag and pass it to your friend outside a convenience store and see what happens. It’s an ATM card that never runs out of cash, as long as you don't run out of nerve or ammo.

Linesman Spikes: Ever want to see the view from the top of a telephone pole? No problem, just don’t touch the high voltage.

Fire Extinguishers: These abundant, free and handy devices are available in public buildings, hospitals and schools; anywhere liability insurance and local regulation require them. Slip one under the coat after midnight mass and you’ve got something for that forgotten somebody on your list. They are especially appreciated under trees when the cheap, Chinese manufactured, string lights arc and the evergreen torches in a festive holiday conflagration.


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