These events critical to the future of the planet took place on December 15:
1811 - Massive earthquake strikes New Madrid, Missouri as the result of cow and chicken droppings that aided global warming, causing Gaia to retaliate.
1939 - Gone With the Wind premiers. Smoke from the burning of Atlanta directly contributed to anthropogenic global warming.
1954 - Fordham University drops football after it is learned that all team sports except soccer contribute to global warming.
1964 - Canada adopts Maple Leaf flag, replacing old emblem of drowned polar bears, bobbing dead in an iceless sea.
1973 - Pirates of the Caribbean ride opens at Disneyland without offsetting its carbon footprint.
1990 - Rock star Rod Stewart marries super model Rachel Hunter in a ceremony that featured fireworks which subsequently destroyed the ozone layer.
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