Saturday, December 26, 2009

PBS 'Fudge Factor' Teaches Kids Science Fakery

ARLINGTON, VA - PBS announced a January 2010 premiere for Fudge Factor, a new program aimed at teaching preschoolers how to fake science data to support global warming. Created in association with the East Anglia Climate Research Unit, the program aims to instruct kids in crafting bogus computer models that will trick people into believing the immanent arrival of environmental doom. "Youngsters are naturally creative," said PBS spokesperson Tara Logan-Taylor. "By using imagination we're building fun into fakery and, hopefully, grooming a new generation of climate scientists." Guiding children on their educational journey is the character of Happy Goodpine. "We didn't want kids to fear the planet, so we came up with Happy. He's sort of the spirit of environmentalism and love of earth all rolled into one." Played by actor Gym Wenger, Happy capers about in a big pine costume, speaking in a high-pitched falsetto. Logan-Taylor points out that "he's the spoonful of sugar that helps the medicine go down, if you follow me." Providing a break from making 2 + 2 = 117, Happy leads little learners in games and activities that revolve around worship and adoration of Gaia. "We have a 28-foot marble effigy of the mother goddess giving birth to Uranus," added Logan-Taylor. "But kids complained about prostrating themselves before the deity because the floor was cold. Then Happy thought of having youngsters remove all clothing and jump over a campfire screaming praises to Gaia, Earth-Mother, All-Good. That seemed to solve the chill problem. We're asking parents at home to supervise their kids should they wish to pass naked through flame in adoration of Gaia. It's a safety issue." (Photo:

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