Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Saab Closure Hurts Bumper Sticker Industry

STOCKHOLM, SWEDEN - GM's decision to shut Swedish subsidiary Saab will severely effect the progressive bumper sticker industry. Said Jesse Clunder-Torman of Forward Thinking Bumper Stickers, "Saabs were big favorites among college professors, government workers, mid-level Hollywood execs, the U.S. State Department and other professional activists. These were people who wouldn't back out of a drive-way without a fender full of liberal slogans. On average, a Saab displayed 3 to 4 more bumper stickers than a VW or Yugo." Clunder-Torman smiled, recalling the days when 'Tax Wealth, Not Work,' and 'Sorry We Can't Provide Universal Healthcare but Iraq Ate Our Budget' were mailed out by the gross. "There's still Volvos and the Prius, but Saabs were the Cadillac of activism. They said to everyone, 'I Care More Than You.' And they had the bumper stickers to back it up." Rumors have surfaced that GM is working on a domestic version of the former East German Trabant. "One can only dream," sighed Clunder-Torman. "And I dream of a better tomorrow that waits for me so we may dream as one. Hey, I think I'll make that into a bumper sticker." (Photo: cafepress.com)

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