Friday, January 22, 2010
WASHINGTON, D.C. - In the face of senate opposition to the reappointment of Ben Bernanke as Federal Reserve Chairman, the President intends replacing Bernanke with UN Ambassador Susan Rice. "She's in Washington most of the time anyway," said an anonymous White House source. "Plus there's little chance she'll be involved in back-room deals or scandal, because she'll treat it [Fed Chair] like a part-time job and only show up for her paycheck." As for Ben Bernanke, he would assume Rice's post as UN Ambassador. "This is even better," said the source. "The UN is so screwed up, there'd be nothing for Bernanke to wreck. He might even accidentally get some of the public's money back. Problem is, he'd hand it over to AIG." The source stated the swap will be made soon, shortly after Joe Biden is exchanged for a lovable sea lion.